So I went for a sleep study on Thursday night… and it was not the most fun thing I’ve ever experienced. Over the last year I’ve been battling sleep deprivation which in turn causes cold and flu symptoms, which has erupted into an Upper Respiratory Infection and chronic fatigue. Anyway, I agreed to do a sleep study after blood work came back that I amperfectly healthy.
Do not be fooled, sleep studies are hard core! I had at least 6 nodes glued to my skull using an epoxy that was only removable with Goo Gone (removes stickers, grease, gum, tar, crayon, and tape from FABRIC). There were another 4 nodes taped to my face, 1 node taped to each leg, and 2 nodes on my chest. Then, there’s the 2 elastic belts that were wrapped around my waist and chest… fun for a woman. Lastly, I had a breathing monitor in my nose.
This is a pretty accurate depiction of what I looked like when I was wired up, from the Sleep Apnea Specialty Centers of Michigan…
At 4:45 am I was woken up to my nurse re-gluing a node to my head that had detached itself from my afro. After another 20 minutes to fall back to sleep, I was awoken again at 6am because “it’s time to get up, Mrs. Waxman.” In the end, all I got was a photocopied form telling me to consult my physician. Great, thanks. My only take-away was that I definitely don’t have sleep apnea, because they would’ve woken me up and fitted me for a mask immediately. Joy.
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